Conch

Sometimes you discover a new flavour that you've never come across before. Conch. Mike Mee tells me it's an endangered species and I can believe it. I now eat as much as I can because soon it won't be available. There are advantages to living in the third world. I will let my guilt consume me later. In the meantime it is...I will enjoy this stunning shellfish. Ja ja ja. Greenie and all.I'm in Khartoum for goodness sakes. Who'd think I can get fresh conch here? It needs to be enjoyed.

Think perlemoen (abalone) crossed with alikreukel( sea snail) and squid (squid). Easy to prepare, a bit of a beating, quick fry up and Voila! Mermaids crying on your tongue. I thought perly was good but this stuff knocks spots off it. You can even make a horn out of it (if you get the shell) as in Lord of the Flies horn thingie. The shell is impressive too. Make excellent earrings for elephants if they were into personal adorments.

Given that shellfish will all probably disappear off the face of the planet in the next 60 years as our oceans acidify due to YOUR (yes, you are the problem) car's exhaust emissions, I feel absolutely no guilt about eating this decidedly delicious beast before its calcareous shell thins and disappears into the oceans.

Best recipe's?

Undoubtedly the old fashioned moer it to death, battered and deep fried. Close second is Thai green curry (use green beans at the end, still crunchy and lots of Holy Basil).